Mosquito Control? They control YOU!

I had NO idea living with mosquitoes could lead to insanity.  No idea!  We've all dealt with them...and wondered why they are part of God's creation.  We've deeted them, zapped them, slapped them, cursed them....  Once we had a world-record mosquito infestation while staying at a cabin in Yellowstone Park.   I used a steno notebook, which I'd snap shut on the swarms, and then check out the rorschach block their blood-bloated bodies would leave (for careful analysis).  The Rorschach inkblot test revealed these pests are evil.  I prefer to donate blood when a friend or next of kin is in need. 

Part of One-Night's Collection

So why did I slip into the insane mode?  Hundreds of them would attack me at night.  I'd stay up with our zapper and hear the mighty crack and witness the blazing light as they went up in smelly smoke.  After a week of sleepless nights I collected some of their bodies and put them on my work shirt for a picture because I felt no one would believe my reasons for being incapacitated and having to send Bob into work alone.   Only a new mother could relate to my complete loss of well-being. 

How were these little buggers getting into our RV?  Did one of the workers who threw our rig together have a "woops" moment and drill a hole in the wrong place?

Our Grandson, Arden, demonstrates the proper use of a Bug Zapper

So...if I did get to sleep at night, the sound of incoming (bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz) would jerk me upright.  Those invasive critters would even fly up my nose!  Turning on the light inevitably revealed rows of mosquitoes lined up on the wall next to me like B-52 bombers on a runway.  This was worse than a nightmare.  I had so many swollen bites on my face I looked like a teenager again, with cystic acne!  Yuk....I'd already done that mega-zit thing and wasn't liking revisiting that place.  I used up my tube of hydrocortisone.  I needed gallon size, as honestly bites were everywhere on my body....even places I just would not be able to show you.

I scanned the internet for any assistance, as all of my "Deep Woods" potions were ignored by these sturdy swamp flying needles.  Thousands of products swam before my blitzed eyeballs.  I knew sleep was the answer, but my tension level had made even rest impossible.  The zapper wasn't the only thing snapping!  But...wait...I found an Army Surplus ad that could be my salvation.  Oh, yeah.

Now....for $4.25, including shipping, and delivery within a few days...can you see the results?  We're talking life-changing confidence has infused my chewed up body.  We're going to sleep tonight!  (I can only hope.)  Write me, if you want to know if this worked:  camphost.white@gmail.com

Do I really sleep in my work clothes?  I'm not saying.

October 24, 2011 - It's a few days later.  And I have to admit, I've been crying.  Wimp?  Yes, I confess.  These black swamp devils (I swear) have been ANGRY with my face net.  They buzz viciously and throw their bodies with all their might against the netting.  Where my nose touches the net, they've bit me without conscious.  The rains have kept us from going anywhere, but yesterday we finally got out and bought some metal mesh to cover any and all vents.  I went to bed with fresh confidence.  I didn't even wear my head-net and (for once) went right to sleep and had a delicious dream that I had a swimming pool filled to the top with raspberry sherbet ice cream. 

Then the mosquito from hell raged at me.  How could something so tiny make such a HUGE sound of outrage??!!??  Never have I heard the sound of such rage.  I jumped out of bed so fast I got a monster leg cramp and fell into our tiny bathroom.  I grabbed our Bug Zapper in self defense.  Mr. Horror, I could see, had a whole fleet of backup pests.  No!  They were still getting in from somewhere.  No sense sleeping...so I'm here at the computer asking YOU...where do you think the entry point is?  Help!

UPDATE:  As of October 26, 2011, I'm still covered with nasty, swollen bites.  Each bite is topped off by an impressive pustule.  Itchy, ugly sores!  Bob has covered every entry point we can think of with aluminum mesh, and caulked every opening or crack.  But I still spend my mornings and evenings trapped in the RV (and even this very moment!) swatting at the black demons with our bug zapper.  This picture of my chewed-up nose was taken before the swelling and pustule formation.  [I have killed 4 mosquitoes in the time it took me to complete the previous sentence!]  And now Hurricane Rina is bringing more water for even more extended breeding grounds.  Help!  I'm sick, insane and apparently allergic to these fiends of nature.